13th
bridal registry
1 Anthony Bourdain
1 funnelcake stand (a no-brainer)
1 gryphon
1 helium machine (so we can talk in silly voices)
1 hot air balloon
1 ice cream maker
1 karaoke machine
1 lighthouse
1 margarita machine
1 mechanical bull
1 moonwalk
1 potbelly pig
1 spiritual healer
1 submarine (so we can see whales up close)
1 UFO (so we can get to our summer home in a galaxy far, far away)
1 walker (for Dana since she is older than Blythe)
2 body pillows
2 Britney Spears (clothing optional)
2 candy wedding rings (we really need these)
2 personal jet packs
2 rubber duckies
2 sets of fake fingernails (which we need to get on quick before the ceremony begins)
2 sets of stilts
2 Slinkies
2 sock monkeys
4 flying trapeses (in case we have friends over)
20 finger puppets
20 toe puppets
a beer of the month subscription
a lifetime supply of Wonderbras (34B and 34C, please)
a magic school bus (Not the books or cartoons, but a real magic school bus. If you get us this you get an automatic invite to all our wild magic school bus parties.)
a personal trainer/personal masseuse
a plethora of feather boas
all-we-can-drink Slurpies
an 8-piece set of Pez dispensers
Banangrams
Canadian money (so we are poised to leave the country if needed)
fake IDs that say we both just turned 18 (w00t! Barely Legal!)
hair extensions
jitterbug lessons
lube (What? We need it.)
matching monogrammed bowling balls
nipple rings (obviously)
porn (just kidding, kinda)
waterless shampoo (for the days we feel like being hippies but still want our hair to look washed)
what the hell, some books of poetry (but only good ones)